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day 164

Hatsurei Ho

(My Malas broke today. In a hotel room, just before I had to leave. I didn’t have time to count them to make sure I had gathered them all, and it made me sick to my stomach; unlike the last time they broke, I’m not ready to let this set go. I’ve been thinking about taking a day off, daunted at the idea of starting at day 1 when I’ve made it ‘so far.’ What is time? What does it matter? What would the benefit be of taking time off? Starting again. Day 1. I do not know. I continued, but I wonder…)

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